How to avoid being a micromanager: Leadership Isn’t About being the Hero
When most people think of military leadership, they imagine the movies: a tough commander barking orders, leading the charge, always the bravest, the strongest, the first through the door.
It makes for great cinema. But it’s terrible leadership.
The Hollywood Myth
Films like Platoon or American Sniper make us believe leaders win respect by being the star of the team. They show the officer or general as the one person who makes the critical difference — the hero who can’t be replaced.
The reality? The best leaders I’ve ever seen are nothing like that. They don’t steal the spotlight. They don’t insist on being the most skilled or the most visible. Instead, they do something far harder: they step back, empower others, and build trust.
What Leadership Really Looks Like
In Afghanistan, I led soldiers through missions where lives were on the line. I never saw leadership succeed through bravado or dominance. I saw it succeed when:
A struggling soldier was given responsibility that helped them grow.
A team member stepped up with their own solution instead of waiting for mine.
We chose empathy after loss, supporting each other instead of demanding toughness.
Leadership wasn’t about me being the hero. It was about creating the conditions for everyone else to succeed.
The Problem With Hero Leadership in Business
This “Hollywood mindset” isn’t limited to war movies. In business, we still glorify the lone CEO, the visionary founder, the boss who never sleeps. We buy into the idea that one extraordinary individual is the key to success.
But here’s the truth: when teams depend on one person, they’re fragile. When that person leaves or falters, the whole system collapses. That’s not leadership. That’s dependency.
The Real Hero Move
The real hero move is making yourself less central, not more. It’s ensuring that when you step away, your team keeps moving forward — maybe even faster. It’s developing people so well that you don’t need to be in the room for the work to thrive.
So next time you catch yourself trying to be the hero, stop. Ask instead: How can I create the space for someone else to rise?
That’s the leadership story worth telling.
Thanks for reading,
Phil